


we'll dance and sing till sundown, and feast with abandon

by Jackie_Kelly



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Anxiety, Archie Andrews is a Good Friend, Depression, Gen, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Jughead Jones Needs a Hug, M/M, Pre-Relationship, season 1 AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-27
Updated: 2019-01-27
Packaged: 2019-10-17 11:00:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 945
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17559110
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jackie_Kelly/pseuds/Jackie_Kelly
Summary: Jughead’s apathy about life had increased as middle school had started, but he had always been able to go to Archie before this past summer.  Now Jughead was alone, abandoned, and homeless.or:Jughead has no healthy coping mechanisms, and Archie tries to be a friend.





	we'll dance and sing till sundown, and feast with abandon

Jughead had never really cared what people thought of him.  He grew up being the kid on the wrong side of the tracks, his parents were divorced, and his dad was a gang leader.  Not really the kid you want to hang out with. It didn’t help that he self-identified as a loner. It wasn’t his fault, sometimes he just didn’t want to be around people.  People were exhausting. The only person that Jughead had never minded being around was Archie. 

But Archie had never counted as people.  

Archie always knew when to give Jughead space—he didn’t mind that there were day that Jughead didn’t want to talk, or do much of anything really.  Jughead’s apathy about life had increased as middle school had started, but he had always been able to go to Archie before this past summer. Now Jughead was alone, abandoned, and homeless.  

🂫 🂫 🂫

Jughead didn’t want to get up today.  He didn’t want to get up most days, and he really had no reason to get up, but the anxiety of not going to school and the risk of being stuck in Riverdale forever and being homeless forever and being the kid from the wrong side of the tracks who was born to amount to nothing forever was  _ too much _ and it was  _ too loud _ . 

Jughead was lucky to have only a few pairs of clothes.  It made getting up in the morning so much easier, less effort that he really didn’t want to put into—well, anything really.  Once he was done getting ready, he quickly made his way to Pop’s to take advantage of the wifi to check his email and work on his story.  He had been at Pop’s last night to work on his homework, and he had a suspicion that Pop was starting to catch on to his situation. Not that Pop would say anything.  

He never ate at Pop’s anymore.  Sure, he loved burgers and shakes and onion rings, but there was a part of him that didn’t want to eat anymore.  Eating just didn’t seem to interest him anymore. Eating took effort. It was starting to show, even FP had noticed last time he had seen him.  

FP didn’t like effort either.  Maybe the bottle made effort easier. 

🂫 🂫 🂫

School officially sucked.  

Reggie hadn’t left Jughead alone since the school day had started.  It wasn’t just Reggie though, everyone at school hated Jughead. If it wasn’t nasty comments, it was nasty looks.  If it wasn’t nasty looks, it was being full on ignored. 

Even Archie, who didn’t have a malicious bone in his body, was willing to ignore Jughead for the entirety of English to talk to new girl Veronica.  Jughead had even ignored the teacher to try to stare Archie into looking at him. To no avail. Now the teacher hated him too, because she thought he was disrespecting her.  

To try to relax his mind, Jughead quickly dug the metal tip of his mechanical pencil into his arm.  He found that the sting helped to quiet his racing thoughts and made the day easier. Plus, the pencil didn’t leave permanent marks.  Which was good. 

He wasn’t doing this for attention.  

Anymore though, the temporary sting wasn’t enough for him.  He had tried to cut himself using the pocketknife FP had given him for his 10th birthday, but he could never bring himself to do it.  Currently, it was stored in a box in Jughead’s movie theatre bedroom. 

But if today was any indication of the year he was going to have he might be forced to attempt to break the mental barriers keeping his hand at bay.  A longer lasting sting would make his mind calm longer. 

🂫 🂫 🂫

Lunch was an interesting affair for Jughead.  He sat and watched as Riverdale’s chosen golden children laughed and ate lunch together.  Archie with his guitar, Betty with her ponytail, and Veronica with her pearls. 

Jughead guzzled water like there was no tomorrow.  He was starting to get a headache, and the effort to drink was so much less than the effort to eat.  Even Jughead knew his body had limits though—and he would have to eat something soon. He would not be Riverdale’s sob story or cautionary tale.  Jason Blossom could keep that title. 

Jughead would be the kid that made something of himself.  

🂫 🂫 🂫

At the end of school was the loneliest time for Jughead.  In spite of being on the outside looking in, being around people was better than being alone.  He would usually go to Pop’s to work on homework to maintain the feeling of being a part of something. 

If only for a little while longer. 

If his plan of being a writer and becoming someone didn’t work, maybe he would just join his dad’s gang.  His dad was an asshole, but at least he wasn’t a lonely asshole. 

It was a bright flash red that pulled Jughead out of his thoughts.  His favorite carrot top was standing right next to his locker. 

“Hey Jug,” Archie said, “are you doing anything later?”

“Why, your girlfriend not want to hang out?” Of  _ course _ Jughead would be the fallback. 

“Veronica? No. She’s… uh… not my type,” Archie stammered out, “I just feel like I haven’t seen you in a while, and I miss us, ya know? I thought maybe we could head out and go to Pop’s—drink a couple milkshakes and work on homework?”

“Oh. Okay.”

Jughead had been planning on doing something else that night.  Mental barriers weren’t going to breakdown themselves after all. 

But maybe, just maybe, Jughead could try to actually be a part of something.

And not just pretend. 

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah. This is supposed to be depressing. Sorry. Please comment if you have a chance :)


End file.
